Bragging is good!

Hi folks,

There are only three sports I play fairly well – Badminton, Football and Cricket. My tryst with Football though ended in an absolutely humiliating defeat, topped with the fact that I got my knees heavily bruised. In school, I was a lanky guy – timid and looked down upon with utter disdain by the usual bullies. They never messed with me in the classroom. But out on the field, I was virtually non-existent. How was an unfit guy like me supposed to compete with the champion players on the field? I mean wasn't it already bad enough that they were being humiliated day in day out, being compared to me when it came to how good I was in academics? There was no way they were allowing me to steal their thunder in something they were so good at. 

Looking back, I realise that the only time I felt inferior and utterly worthless was while playing football. The last time I played football was in the eleventh standard. I was the goalkeeper and our team was leading in the first half. But like always, my team choked when it mattered. Well, I choked! Why a team I am in, always chokes? It felt terrible. I was dejected and that wasn't the first time, you see. No wonder, I am all at sea when my peers have a passionate discussion on EPL and Champion’s League.

Badminton was an indoor sport I played, more for killing time than anything else. And to be frank, playing Badminton allowed me to vent out my feelings whenever I was frustrated or angry. I was really good at smashing the badminton cock, sometimes literally to smithereens. Quite something for a stick-thin guy! Even then, I was a good doubles player. But that was just about it.

So, needless to say, I was a really good cricketer. So much so that had my father been rich enough to send me to a cricket coaching institute, who knows! I can say this with a fair degree of pride that I am a self-made cricketer. *Laughing at myself* I never managed to play beyond the school level. But it was simply because Cricket wasn't my priority. And look where that has landed me to! Pun obviously intended...

Anyway, I have fond memories when it comes to Cricket. I was a very good deep fielder. I have held stunning one handed catches – each one of which I vividly remember till date. I have effected run outs for my team in crucial match winning moments. And sometimes in one of those days gone horribly wrong, I have also spilled the simplest of catches. My lean personality didn't allow me to go for lofty shots. So, as a batsman, the ‘Dravid’ school of batting technique suited me the most. I would be dismissed mostly while attempting a lofty shot or try an adventurous cheeky run. Otherwise, I was so good at sticking around and converting the ones into twos that the opposition would instead try to dismiss the other batsman. My tall frame allowed me to play even the short balls better. But if you look at my wagon-wheel in batting, I was a dominant leg-side batsman. The only shots I played really well on the off-side were the late cuts. Enough of boasting, Sandy! I never bragged like this before and you might be wondering why.

Because, two weeks ago, while playing for league matches organised by the HR guys, I opened the innings for my team in a 15-15 over match. At the team meeting held a day before, I volunteered to open the innings. Call it the effect of monotony at the workplace, but I actually wanted to be under pressure and feel the surge of adrenalin through my body once again. Weird, I guess. But sometimes, monotony takes a toll on you. And that’s when people like me take impulsive decisions – most of which are associated with a high risk high returns payoff. The last time I felt butterflies in my stomach was on the day of graduation at IIMA. So, when I had pre-match jitters, going through the motions rather anxiously and pacing to and fro in the room, my roomies were amused; wondering why I was taking the match so seriously. ‘Dude, it’s a bloody HR team-building endeavour. Just play for fun and enjoy,’ is all they said. 

But I wanted to do well. I really wanted to be a match-winner, again. I wasn't feeling like a winner for quite some time. Do you know how it feels to be on top of the world? ‘Utopian-exhilaration’ is the word! I have been a winner for most part of my life. IIMA was a humbling experience though. So for me, this league match was a golden opportunity to redeem the winner in me. Now you know why my tone in this post is boasting in nature. For a change, that feels good. It feels great to tell you that I did a pretty good job as an opening batsman, especially when wickets around me were tumbling. Literally!

We won the toss and decided to bat first. The team felt that anything above 100 was a pretty good score to defend. And I was to play the anchor, at least till the first six overs. Alas, the team lost three wickets in the first three overs itself. The opposition was bowling well, keeping it tight. Even my personal score was in single digits. There was no way to let loose and attempt stupid shots. It was time to build a partnership. Thankfully, the new batsman started playing his shots right away and that allowed me to rotate the strike. His strokes released the pent up pressure and lifted our spirits. I was happy taking the ones and twos, with occasional boundaries and giving most of the strike to him. Our partnership ended in the twelfth over, when I holed out to the fielder in the deep. With a personal score of 30 and a strike rate of 85, I was applauded for my performance. It felt great, when my teammates patted my shoulders in appreciation.

But then again, my team choked pretty badly. As a part-time pacer, I did my bit, trying to resurrect my team’s fortunes when I got a batsman out caught in the gully. But three catches off my bowling in the next five balls were spilled or not attempted at all. I was dejected, not because my team lost but the way we didn't try to win.

Nevertheless, I was still happy with myself. It felt great to feel the surge of adrenalin in a strange way. Exhilarating, when you have realized that there is no need to run, for the shot you have hit is going away for a boundary. It took a good performance in Cricket to remind me how good I was in school, winning mostly and being a pretty sore loser. I realised that for a winner, being humble is the greatest virtue anyone can ever possess. But who doesn't like a little spice sometimes? It’s alright to deliberately put yourself under pressure and come out triumphant. You’re humble and that’s fine. But sometimes, it’s okay to be bragging about your successes under pressure, however insignificant and silly it might seem or look. It’s critical that we sometimes indulge in something that invokes the warrior spirit in us. It’s a win-win bet. You win, you brag and feel good. You lose and it is a humbling experience. You learn from your mistakes and try to emerge victorious the next time.

Hail the philosopher in me! Although, I must admit that most people who know me well avoid invoking my philosophical alter ego. Probably the reason why I am a better listener!

signing off,

taureansandy

Is Facebook a Parasite or a Virus?

Hi Folks,

Is Facebook a virus or a parasite? Based on the dictionary meaning of both the nouns ‘Virus’ and ‘Parasite’, I infer that it is more like a parasite than a virus. It has diffused through our minds via the Internet and derives its nutrition from our irresistible urge to know what is going on in the lives of our peers, friends and acquaintances.

Now you might be wondering why describe FB in medical terms all of a sudden. Call it the fascination with medicine and everything remotely to do with biology these days. It is because, of late quite a lot of action has been happening in my life with a direct link to FB. And then, I  am beginning to wonder whether I have become a FB addict of sorts or not. Let me restate some facts before I proceed further:

• If Facebook were to be a country, it would be the third largest populous country in the world
• According to an official study done by Facebook, 190 is the average number of friends each one of us has in it
• People now spend more time on Facebook than the time they spend daily on personal hygiene!!

Given these facts, I now have a disclaimer to make. Unlike the past, when I made sure not to hurt any sentiments through my blogs, this time I am going to be blunt and straight. So it won’t be a surprise if you as a reader don’t agree with some or all of the points and statements that I am going to make. Read further at your own risk!!

It was only yesterday that I read ‘Mark Zuckerberg marries his long time girlfriend Chan’. My first reaction was – So what? Then today, it was reported that Facebook’s stock is down after the IPO. It actually failed to ‘outperform’ and even the underwriters JP Morgan & Morgan Stanley couldn’t do much despite dumping an additional 84 million shares later. Though it was bad news for the thousands of retail investors, it was sheer music to my ears. I share a love-hate relationship with Facebook, but of late I have started wondering whether I would get rid of the addiction to it or not. And so, I am beginning to wish and pray for a divine intervention that would stop FB on its tracks and stop it further from playing havoc with my life.

If a fifth grader would ask me what ‘Facebook’ is all about, I would tell him one or all of the following depending on his ability to understand what I am trying to say (That Facebook is a bad place to be in!!)

• Facebook is a country where people (including yours truly) don’t mind their business and instead are interested in other’s lives!! (Pun Intended)
• Facebook is a country where people speak only three words ‘Like’, ‘Comment’ and ‘Share’
• Facebook is a place where a simple status message put up by a decent girl would attract infinite ‘Likes’ whereas the same is not applicable to a boy/guy
• Facebook is an institute that can teach even an introvert the ‘art of flirting’ with girls/guys/gays (Read Section 377 of the Indian Constitution)
• Facebook is an addiction

It is not as if I abhor FB completely. I love it for the following reasons

• Facebook enables me to stay in touch with all those fellow Facebookers who have literally forgotten the fact they have something known in common parlance as a ‘Cellular Phone’
• Facebook lets me dump my stupid thoughts and opinions through a feature known as a ‘Status Message’ (Otherwise, I would have definitely become a nervous wreck not knowing what to do with the useless thoughts my brain conjures up time and again!!)
• Facebook is the source of all the minuscule traffic that I ever manage to get to my blog and is also a marketing medium where I plan to potentially bombard you readers with requests to read up my upcoming untitled imaginary book (God knows when it will be published!!)

But I hate it more for reasons that are countless. Given the spatial constraints and the need to not piss Mr Mark Zuckerberg off, I shall list only a few of them

• Facebook is the only way my relatives constantly keep track of my activities. So I can’t use words like ‘Love’, ‘Engaged’, ‘Single’ and ‘Committed’. Using these words is a strict no-no for them and is a sign that I am turning to a spoilt brat!!
• My niece’s are also in FB. Come on, they are still kids for god’s sake!!
• FB increases the expectations that you have from your friends and peers. I am expected to hit ‘Like’ or ‘Share’ to every photo or status message uploaded/put up by dear friends/relatives even if I don’t like them
• FB is also a place where my messages and comments are misconstrued and where I also sometimes end up misunderstanding other’s comments
• I have to constantly filter out people from my friend’s list and put them in the ‘Custom’ category under the default privacy option
• Wherever I go, FB follows (Geo tagging and tracking)
• When I log in, FB almost inevitably shows me status messages from people I want to ignore or forget (Does Mark Zuckerberg hold a grudge on me?)
• And what the hell!! Do I care about how many points X has scored over Y in a game Z? Naah!!
• The ‘timeline’ feature initially seemed very sugary but now has become so bitter that I feel like having a little honey

And the list goes on. Is there a cure to Facebook addiction? I don’t think so. In my case, it has reached a critical mass (Read 650+ friends, half of whom I barely know!!). I desperately want to get rid of it but can’t understand how to. Can you help me? Of course, I know where there is a will there is a way out as well. But the addiction has reached to levels where I now have a widget of it on my android phone. So I urge you readers to suggest some practical solutions so that I get de-addicted without having to delete my account for good.  

One of my colleagues doesn’t have a Facebook account. In fact, he doesn’t have any account in any social networking site at all. I was initially shocked. But later I realised that probably it was one of the best decisions he had made in life – Not to have any presence in the virtual world. This blog post is dedicated to him; a guy I want to be like, content and very happy like the people from Bhutan!! J

signing off,

taureansandy

Transition

Hii all,

Its been a long time since I blogged. There was a time when blogging was a regular activity for me; for which I could take out time and vent out my feelings on various issues. But from the day I made the transition from being a student to a manager, life has never been the same again.

As a student, you have less things to worry about. Its all about scoring good marks, making good friends with whom you can be yourself and dealing with the burden of expectations which your dear ones have. You do have a choice. You can either do well as a student or screw up your career, sit at home and become a zombie. But there comes the transition phase, you become a professional and things change drastically. There is a fundamental shift in your personality. There is a sudden sense of responsibility and you feel more mature than ever. Of course there are always exceptions, but I am talking about the majority of us. Or at least this is what has happened with me. The me who earlier never thought twice before spending money for his indulgence, now at least thinks twice before doing so. The me who never shied to speak his mind with his dear pals now is beginning to think of the repercussions if he does so. The me who earlier struggled to understand the subtle hints his pals used to give, now doesn't find it difficult.

In my case, the transition was smooth and the best part of it is that I realize this change happening. And it has been because of the two years I spent at IIMA, away from best friends and family. And in these two years, I have traveled like never before which I guess is also one of the driving factors behind the change/transition I was talking about earlier. Two months back, I became a manager in a big Indian conglomerate.

Its not only me that feels the change. One of my very good friend almost spoke my mind, when one fine day she sent me a rather emotional sms which I must say was very uncharacteristic of her. She was experiencing a void, something which each and everyone of us at some point of time do experience. Despite having a great set of friends and a set career in life, there is this feeling that you are missing something. And that 'something' is happiness. It was the same experience which me and my friend were going through. Now the question arises on how to tackle such kind of a conundrum. The answer I guess is very simple. Watch a beggar on the street or a struggling rickshawallah. But not many people follow this mantra and that also includes me, for we are so preoccupied with our life or rather I should say we are so egoistic that our problems are always the worst and can't be compared. Leaving aside the philosophical aspect of it (which I am so good at ;-) ), how many people would consider leaving a well paid MNC job to follow their heart's desires?? Not many; but fortunately there are some people whom I have had the good opportunity to meet with during my travails across the country.

At this point of time, I recall an incident which astounded me and made me realize the importance of being earnest and the value of staying humble. At my age, I was the champ in multiplication tables. I was having a great time with my cousin brothers and sisters at the public park at my native town. That was a Sunday evening, pleasant with birds chirping all the way and the setting Sun looking as majestic as it has been all these years. Suddenly, my uncle asked me to accompany him to a blind school where he often does some voluntary charity for the kids. The creaking door at the entrance of the school gave me the impression of the workhouses often described in Charles Dickens' novels. But to my pleasant surprise, it was well maintained. Even as I was looking at the children diligently studying through their Braille textbooks, my uncle called up Shiva.

Shiva was hardly about 4 years old. The warden said he was just three and a half. A frail looking boy who was hardly three feet tall, he straightaway identified my uncle and confidently pronounced, "Namaste sir". I was speechless. Not because he was a frail blind boy, but because I never expected such levels of maturity from a three and a half year old boy. I bent down, introduced myself and gave him a candy. He initially refused politely and that spoke volumes about the way he was being groomed in an excellent manner. But later he took it on my insistence. Then started the magic show. My uncle asked him to recite the multiplication table for the digit 19. He started off with, " 19*10, 19*9, 19*8.......and so on and ended it on 19*1=19. Incredible as it was, he was bang on target!! It was like he stupefied me. He made me look like a stupid arrogant fool. And when I challenged him to tell the table for the digit 17. He smoothly delivered the answers. I was so humbled that I was looking for something else to give him as a reward. When I couldn't find anything suitable in my pockets, I appreciated his flair for mathematics and then there was the thousand watt smile, much brighter than the "Happydent smile". That is when it struck me that nothing works more effectively than well deserved words of appreciation, something which I learnt in the first year of MBA.

Now what does the above mentioned incident tell you? In plain terms, it tells you that you are nothing. It takes a lifetime for us to become something and unless you reach that stage, keep your ego in check. Of course, this is something which is difficult to follow at all situations. But, an awareness of this fact will hold us in good stead. Though I am having a tough time trying to settle down professionally, but I have got a good gang of friends who I share a great rapport with. And there are my old and very very special pals who understand me so well that sometimes I genuinely feel the need to improve my non-verbal communication skills. Hoping that this period of transition brings with it lots of happiness to look forward to; both for me as well as for my dear ones and special pals who form an integrated part of my life.

Signing off,

taureansandy

Four kinds of people

Hii folks,

He questioned me," Aap mera interview le rahe hain tab se. Ab mein aapse yeh sawaal karta hoon. Kitne type ke log hote hain duniya mein?". I wasn't expecting this bouncer from a roadside vendor. I said," Shayad teen type ke hain. Pehle jo paise ke peeche bhagte hain. Doosra jinke liye paise important nahi hai. Teesra....hmmmm...Pata nahi". At that moment he was no more a roadside vendor for me. He was speaking like someone who indeed has a keen business acumen and someone who has learnt a lot just by observations and listening to various people. He replied back," Bhai, yahaan char type ke log hote hain. Pehle jo paise ke peeche bhagte hain, doosre jo paise ko bhaav nahi dete, jinke liye shaurat zaroori hai, teesre woh hain jinke liye ethics hi maine rakhti hai aur chaute woh log hain jo paisa aur shaurat dono chahte hain." I was stunned with his response. Needless to say, he was already someone whom I will be admiring for years to come.

For those who couldn't guess the person I am talking about, he is RAMBHAI. Rambhai is not just a name, it is a brand whose equity can't be valuated. Rambhai is synonymous with IIMA; might be exaggerating a little but I can't think of any better adjectives to describe this man. He is "Khuddari" personified, one who has immense self-belief in his abilities. He mightn't be a big entrepreneur like Dhirubhai, but whatever he has achieved is purely on his merit and nothing else. Unlike other entrepreneurs who wouldn't mind resorting to slightly devious means to get things done, Rambhai is a "shield" who has endured the bullets of corruption and ridicule for many many years.

He could have been the next Abdul Kalam, had it not been for the costly fees that he couldn't afford to pursue engineering. He would have been working now as a senior technical officer in the Physical Research Laboratory, had it not been for the "Recommendation Letter" which one of his peers was carrying while waiting at the interview lounge. Did destiny had other plans for him? No, I am sorry but he made his own choices and changed his destiny. That is what I would like to believe. I should recall one particular incident that Rambhai described about how he fought with people who undermined his capabilities and ridiculed him. His plans were to setup a small "kitli" within the campus. This would have helped him expand his customer base. But for that to happen, he was asked to give a "Bottle" of booze as a "token" or bribe by one of the assistants who he reckons is still working in the campus. But Rambhai knew that the goodwill he had earned would sail him through and now look how IIMA has acknowledged his services. Provision for a small window on a huge 10 feet high wall exclusively for Rambhai so that he can do business with the residents of the campus - What more could he have asked for?

Rambhai is confidence personified. His strong will and determination is something whose vibes you can easily feel when you hear him talking about IIMA, his erstwhile competitors and his family. You will rarely come across a person who would smile fully knowing that tough times are back for him to reckon with. Recession and inflation have been the two bombs that his shield couldn't protect him from. Dents on the shield are starkly visible when he says that he is now ready to compromise on his values and accept any sort of financial help offered by the Alumni and the students of IIMA with noble intentions. You feel sorry for him when such words come from a man who has endured all the cruelty and corruption present in the society for about close to 30 years now. He used to sell cigarettes and other such stuff on credit, but people have clearly contributed in inflating the Accounts receivable section on his balance sheet. He is pinning his hopes now on the huge footfall that the Campus is going to attract for its Golden Jubilee celebrations.

Before I wound up the session with him, he mentioned that there is nothing left to achieve now in his life. He just wants to finish up completing three tasks before he retires from life:

• Marry off his daughter to a "Good" guy. He satirically stressed on the word "Good" and that very moment I felt sorry for guys like us!!
• Buy property so that those of his family who are dependent on him have a home to live in, especially after the way in which he recently had to sell off his property to sustain his family expenditures
• Ensure that his grandson who is now in the Sainik School join the Indian Army

I was clearly in awe of this man who had such a crystal clear clarity of thought; one who had set definite goals for himself and is clearly working hard to achieve those. His response to an erstwhile vendor who once competed with him was - "Yaa to mein tik jaunga ya khud hi dhandha chod doonga" best epitomizes his "Never say Never" spirit which I believe each one of us inherently has, but is something we need to be constantly reminded of.

Regards,

taureansandy

Trust vs fear.....

hii folks,

When you check out the meaning of the word "trust" in an Oxford Dictionary, you will find not one but many meanings to it. But for me "trust" is to allow without "fear", which means that fear and trust can't be together. Relationships are built on "trust" and not "fear". Fear is often used in conjunction with the word "Discipline". But both are entirely different and this is where people especially teachers fall in the trap. Very few realise that "Love" and "Discipline" can co-exist. Breakups, violence, suicides and all such ghastly things wouldn't have found their place in the dictionaries if people realise this often unsaid truth.

"Trust" is such a light word literally, but people have made it "Heavy" by adding "Expectations" to it. The sacred Hindu text "Gita" says the same, that do what you are supposed to without "expecting" results. So, in a relationship, love and take care of someone without expecting anything in return. And most often people like me and you do the same mistake of expecting something in return. And that's when "Trust" seems to be very precious, something which is not bestowed on others easily. "Suspicion" and "Doubts" often become the villain in this whole equation. But for any villain there always exists a "Hero" and to me that hero is " Forgiveness". To forgive is to love someone, to love someone is to trust someone, to trust someone we love is what "God" sent us for!!

regards,

taureansandy.

wats LOVE???

I don't know wats love..why did god create it? actually god didn't create it for it can't be defined..but one thing love can make a man or for that matter a woman do things which can be defined as something crazy by the world..love can even break hearts and thats very painful..very painful..but when a man and a woman are in deep love then no force in this world except death can break them apart...even death can't prevent a reunion between ADAM and EVE in the heavens...hope everybody falls in love and lets make our earth a better place to live in....